Christmas spirit….

…is something that I’ve been lacking lately.  Oh, I am very blessed with family and friends, I can’t complain about that.  Just found it hard to find the joy in the season this year.  Seems like the time just flew by and I don’t enjoy the crowds at the stores, so I did a lot of shopping online this year.  Might do more of it next year.  I did see a wonderful Christmas concert that was put on by Alex’s 4th and 5th grade choir.  Just lovely music, the kids did a wonderful job and made me smile to see them enjoying themselves so much.

The children are with their dad on Christmas, we celebrated our usual way on Christmas Eve, instead of Christmas morning, because this year they will be home on New Year’s Eve.  In the past, Nate had them until New Year’s Day, so that will be something special and new.  We will be celebrating with sparkling juice of some kind and hopefully, with Mick, though he’ll still only be here on the phone or through chat.  He’s been working so many hours due to the time of year, he won’t have a lot of time off.

So, I’m home with the cat and the dog and I had a lovely Christmas with the kids and my parents on Christmas Eve.  I got lucky and Mick was home on Christmas day, so we got to spend several hours today, together, as much as we could, given the distance.  He’s a very good fellow.  Today, he told me that we would find a solution, we’d find a way, to make everything work.  I certainly hope so.  He’s my favorite.

I’m looking into moving to the west coast, preferably Washington state, on the coast somewhere.  Just tired of the Iowa winters and looking for a change of scenery.  The white knuckle driving after a storm isn’t my idea of a good time.   I love all my family and friends here, but really ready for a change and I know that I’ve put off moving for a long while.  At first, when I wanted to go, Nate and I had just gotten divorced and I didn’t want to separate him from the children.  Then I started school and had to wait it out for that time frame.  I’ve been done with school for three years now, wanting to keep the kids in the schools that I know are good, afraid to switch them to somewhere less equipped to deal with my bright children.  But I think one more year, perhaps, and their foundation will be good enough to go anywhere.  It probably is now.

So, my Christmas spirit was lacking, but I do wish all of you a very merry Christmas. I hope it’s been wonderful and that you’ve all enjoyed your families and time with them.

Home again, home again.

So, I rolled into my front door at about 10 p.m. CST last night.  The cat promptly attempted to kill me.  In her enthusiasm to see me, she was under my feet right away, into the bathroom, following me through the kitchen, back across the living room, to my room.  She was crying at my door and scratching it with her paws.  I sat down to email Mick and she was on my lap and on the laptop and on my head and on my shoulder – anywhere, _anywhere_ she could knead me with her kitty claws.  She has an extra toe on each paw, so it’s a lot of claws.  Even when I attempted to go to sleep, kitty decides that I have not yet been punished enough and proceeds to knead my head, off and on for about another two hours.

Tonight, I went to pick up the children and the dog, so we didn’t get home until almost eight.  ”Meow!” says the kitty, which really meant “Where the hell have you been again?”  I thought that the addition of the dog and the children might distract the cat from me, but apparently, not so much.  As soon as I go to the bathroom, she’s in there.  Kneading my legs, meowing, letting me know that I’ve been just a no-good, terrible, horrible, evil owner who never gets to leave the house for an extended period again.  And as soon as I open the laptop, kitty is back on my lap, on the laptop, clawing the shit out of my shoulders and chest.  I have removed her several times.  Clearly, I’m not forgiven and I’m not apologetic enough for her to stop abusing my person.

Now, to get back to my trip, first things first – I had a great time.  I could wax poetic about the beauty of Phoenix, which is breathtaking no matter how you look at it or when, but I’ll let someone else do that.  Mick and I ended up staying in Tempe, about two blocks, if even that, away from Arizona Mills mall. (Compared to where I shop at home, that place was huge! But pretty nicely laid out, so walking around it wasn’t a major pain in the ass, even on Black Friday!)  We swam in the pool (and relaxed in the hottub) three of the four days we were there, just weren’t thinking about it on Thursday night.  Definitely got some strange looks from the locals for that, but seriously, 70+ degrees, end of November, in a heated pool and hottub?? I will take it!

I’ve been trying to think all day about what I should say about Mick.  I don’t want to be sappy or too sweet or too crude, because I could do all of those things.  I will just say, I am a person who laughs a lot. I can find a lot of things funny.  However, I usually laugh or chortle or chuckle or snort and I am not a giggler.  Mick makes me giggle.  And he gives me nosekisses, who the heck does that?  Mick does.

I’ll just relate one short (and to me, totally funny) story of one of our escapades.  We’re in the pool and I float up to him, he picks me up and I say, “Well, sir, what do you think you’re doing?” And he says, “I’m rescuing you.” I look around the pool and reply, “From what?  There are only the two of us in the pool.” “From the sharks.” “What sharks?” “Trouser shark!!”

I laughed so hard at that and I turned bright, bright red!  Still thankful no one else was around to hear it or my laughter.  I’m very amused at him now, days later!

And even though Mick is hyper self-conscious about dancing with a partner (or by himself), the dancing on Sunday night is something I won’t soon forget.  If I wasn’t already aware of it, that man is a keeper.  Oh yes, yes, he is.

Thanksgiving week….

…most of the week is over.  One more working day and then a good portion of Thursday will be flying.  I’m flying out of Des Moines, stopping over in Dallas and then finally landing in Phoenix.

The children have a half day tomorrow and their dad is picking them up after school and taking them home with him for the long weekend. I’m grateful that he’s also taking the little dog with them.  It’s also Grandparents Day at Alex’s school, so my mom will go partake in the festivities and Alex will get some grandma time.  Good for them both.  My mom will be watching the little cat, so all the bases are covered.

I want to say that I’m not at all apprehensive about how Phoenix will work out, but that would be a big ol’ lie, and I’m gonna be honest – pretty nervous.  Mick is such a good guy and I know he isn’t one of those people who’d pressure me into anything and deep down I know everything is gonna be fine – but that step off the plane, trying to locate him in the airport…..nerves!!!

 

Other than that, I just want to wish all of you a very happy Thanksgiving! I hope the food is terrific and your family gatherings bring  you joy and love, only good things! I’m sending love to all of you.

Presenting…

On Thursday, I’ll be presenting to one of my old professor’s honors seminars.  Very similar to the one I took as an honors student, but slightly different.  I’m not sure if I’m ready.

I’ll have to give a good accounting of my own honors project, which isn’t a problem. I’ve reviewed my thesis. (And boy, that read was long! I’d forgotten just how long it was.)  I just get to go in, present my work, explain why I picked my topic (American Muslim Women Post 9/11), how I researched it, etc.  It won’t be bad and may be fun, though I am somewhat apprehensive about actually presenting.  So, that is the next big thing on the docket, presenting to Ralph’s honors seminar on Thursday morning.

On my birthday, ‘New Moon’ comes out, so I’m sure I’ll be taking the children to see that.  I’m looking forward to it, the sequel looks better than the first one to me.  I could be wrong.

The week after that is Thanksgiving week and Phoenix with Mick.   We’ve had some serious hiccups this week, because flights needed to be moved around, but right now, everything is looking golden.   Let’s just hope for no more flight changes, eh?

Cheese and nicknames….

So, this afternoon Mick and I were talking and it was pretty obvious that there is a certain amount of cheese in our relationship.  I like that he is cheesy, because it allows me to do it, too.   As my birthday falls relatively close to our trip, Mick wants to do something to celebrate it.  Initially, we talked about going out for a drink, dinner and then dessert, maybe dancing, and then we started talking about cheese and Mick wondered about doing something with cheese and wine.  So, if any of you have an idea about Phoenix and places that do that sort of thing, I’d appreciate knowing where we could go.

Nicknaming people is just something I do.  I rarely call anyone by their name, I’m not really sure why.  Everyone I know (and mostly, those that I like) is honey, sweetie, babe, dear.  The kids have a zillion nicknames and I confuse people when referring to them when we’re out.  Rian goes by Alex at school and I tend to use that and call out ‘Lex, Lexi, Xandra’…..whatever is handy.  Scott’s nickname is Buddha, so it shortens down to Bood or Boody, when he was younger, I called him by his second first name, which is Micheal, and he would get pissed off when anyone else called him by it.  Now, Rian and her little buddies use Buddha and he gets mad about that, but he can’t tell her friends no, because he isn’t that mean – he just tells her that it is Mom’s nickname for him.  Darren came with his own nickname that almost everyone uses for him, which is Mick.  I call him Mick, or honey,  or Darren William Nelson, or just plain D, sometimes ‘that dirty Irish Canuck’ or when I’m being very crude Big Dick Mick.  (And I’m getting so killed for adding that last one!!)

I’m not sure why I like nicknames so much, I just do.  My own name tends not to allow for a nickname and Mick just uses ‘darlin’ or ‘baby’ and sometimes he’ll call me a Yank, which cracks me up.    I mean, I am obviously an American, so it fits and I do live in one of the northern states, so I won’t pout.

We went and saw ‘The Vampire’s Assistant’ on Friday afternoon/evening.  I thought it was alright, a tiny bit gory, but nothing that my daughter hasn’t seen in episodes of Buffy.  Scott seemed a little upset at some of the book to movie changes.   It definitely seemed to me to be a movie for teenagers.  The language wasn’t bad and there was some good writing throughout, I did enjoy John C. Reilly as the (in my mind) very unlikely vampire.  Definitely an interesting take on the vampire mythos.

Tomorrow we’re going to head out to the corn maze at Bloomsbury Farm.  Need to find some pumpkins and get lost in the maze.  We’ll come home and carve a pumpkin or two.  Goodtimes.

Thanksgiving….

..is going to be in Phoenix.

Mick and I were initially set on Seattle, and then we looked at Las Vegas, but the flights kept going up as we were trying to book them.  The last time we tried Vegas, I was booking and the flight price went up $200.  We probably looked at 40 different locations around the States, trying to pin one down.  One that would be super for me would be terrible for him.  One great for him would be horrible for me.  Three times I was booking and the price went up significantly.  We picked a hotel in Vegas and it jumped $250 for Mick.

I mentioned looking at Phoenix and Mick goes, “This is the last one for tonight, I don’t want you throwing the laptop.”  Fortunately, it worked out great for both of us. We’re both booked and set.   It wasn’t my intention to be someplace warm and sunny over the holiday, but I can’t see how it’ll be a bad thing at all, especially given that I’ll have Mick’s company the whole time.  The children will be with their dad for the holiday.  The last bits to be set are the cat and the dog, but I think it can be done.

Just have to get there.

just sometimes…..

 

….I wish that there was someone I could talk about this with.

 

All of our mutual friends live near him, can be there for him.  And it’s gotten very, very hard.  I’m starting to question quite a lot.

It’s been a while….

Since I’ve posted anything at all.

Last Friday, Alex had an asthma attack and things have been a bit jumbled and messy since then.  She was admitted into the University’s Peds Intensive Care Unit on Saturday, moved down to the regular Peds floor on Sunday afternoon, tested for allergies on Monday morning and then she was released for home around noon on Monday.

We came home, got the new meds from our local pharmacy and on Tuesday morning, she woke up with a terrible bumpy rash, head to toe.   Went back to her local doctor and we pulled her off one of the antibiotics.  She’s never reacted badly to one before, but this one is tied to penicillin, which both of my parents are allergic to, though I am not.  Luckily, the rash is mostly gone now, except where she scratched quite a bit.

As you can imagine, neither of us got much sleep while she was actually in the hospital, though I think we are mostly caught up by now.  We’re just trying to get her albuterol needs under control and then she can go back to school.

The story is much more involved than I am putting here and more scary to me, which is perhaps why I am reluctant to say too much about it.   It’s just never a joyful thing to see your baby, even at 9 years old, in a hospital bed, with two ivs and an oxygen mask and five different things going into those ivs and looking so small and helpless.  

I’ve been blessed by my friends during this time, thank you, everyone.  You’ve really helped and I know your good thoughts and your prayers made a difference in her recovery. I love you all.

I also need to give a big shout out to my sweetheart, Mick.  He has done everything possible for him to do to get me through this, whilst retaining my sanity.   It continually bowls me over what sweet things that man is capable of and does.  Much love, babe.

Gym and the interwebs…..

I’ve been to the gym three times since Friday, taking the night off tonight, as the cable gentlemen installed our cable, interwebs and phone.

I wanted to catch a nap today, but it was not to be.  I may need to replace the tv and update the router, though we’ll see.

The children are thrilled for the cable bits, as you might imagine.  Therefore, I am putting up with ‘Beverly Hills Chihuahua’ for their sakes, right now.  Starz on demand, you know.  No mas! No mas! No mas! Find your bark!  Si, that which makes you mighty!!  I’m just glad that my turn is next, aiyiyi.

In other news…

…yesterday, I joined a 24/7 fitness place about 10 minutes from my house.  I’m telling myself that sometimes at 10pm, I will want to go workout.  Uh huh. 

And next week, the cable guys will be bringing cable, internet and a landline to my place.  So, I might be moving into this century.  There was only so long that I could hold out.

I’m not a luddite, really.  Stop looking at me like that.